i'm not going to cry...

Sunday, September 13, 2009

i'm not going to cry.

i'm going to be a big girl tomorrow morning, because i need to be.

i need to be strong because my little baby sweet girl is going to school for the very first time.

granted, it's not like she's going to be going to college, or even junior high...it's *just* preschool, but that doesn't take away from the fact that the last 3 1/2 years, where she has been my constant companion, have flown by.
i'm not going to cry.

i'm not.

i'm not going to think about the first time i looked into her eyes, her first smile, her first steps, her first words...the first time she wrapped her arms around me and told me she loved me.

i'm not going to think about the moment a month ago when she told me i was her very bestest friend.

i'm not going to think about how this is the first *big* step away from me.

i'm not.

instead, i'm going to smile. 

i'm going to reassure.

i'm going to take oodles and oodles of pictures.

i'm going to tell her how big and brave i think she is.

i'm going to hug her a little bit tighter...a little bit longer.

i'm going to kiss her good-bye, remind her to be good and walk out the door...

and then i'll cry.