and lyla, she was the first to say it close to your face, "happy birthday, daddy!"
and livie, stuck with having to crowd in next to me, kept trying to lay on top of my face so that she could peer at yours.
did you hear her? did you hear her whisper over and over how handsome her daddy-prince was?
i listened to your voice, all gravely and soft with sleep, respond to their excitement over you.
because birthdays are meant for celebration. and birthdays are meant to be proclaimed loudly over - even moreso if it's before 7 in the morning!
and while i wanted to burrow deeper under the covers, because that is what one is supposed to do when the sun is barely up, you opened your eyes and you looked at them.
and you saw their joy.
and you responded in kind.
well...maybe a bit quieter than them...
eleven years of knowing you, 10 years of being married to you and i am still amazed at the contrasts between us.
you, the man who needs little sleep and is happy when the siren call of the little ones pulls us out of dreams.
your ease in social situations,
your quick-thinking mind,
your ability to problem solve on your feet that are already running towards the next fire that needs to be put out.
you amaze me.
and i think, these on their own would draw me to you...this woman who is your polar opposite in every way...
but you love Jesus.
and He created you to be who you are and He placed inside of you all of these abilities and things that intrigue me and because you love Him,
because you love Him,
you are more.
i think the last 2 years could have made you less.
taken away who you are and replaced it with a shell.
could have emptied you out and broken you completely.
but, when it all started, this whirlwind that finds us here, you said to me in the dark, we aren't going to fall apart. we aren't going to let this break us. we will keep glorifying God.
you have clung to that, even when the pain has been great, when sorrow has threatened to overwhelm you and joy has seemed so far away.
i have watched you cling to our Heavenly Father.
you turn 37 today.
{which, by the way, i find terribly attractive.}
37 years ago today, your sweet mama held you in her arms and whispered your name over your soft, downy head and your lungs filled for the first time and your very first cry was heard.
i am so thankful for this day.
because this day means you.
happy birthday, sweet tony.
i love you.
always.
