making new friends while missing the old ones...

Monday, April 28, 2008

for about a month after we left washington, lyla was forever searching the house looking for her best friends, logan and noah. when she couldn't find them, she would plunk herself down and cry for what seemed like forever. sometimes i'd join heart understood her need to be near the people who knew and loved her. she grieved, i grieved and while we both still miss our friends deeply, i think we are both coming out of our doldrums.

it's funny how having children will force you out of your introverted-ness. being the homebody that i am, i thoroughly enjoy my times of solitude and can go a couple of days without being social and (so i have thought) be fine. lyla, being the social butterfly that she is, is not so fine being stuck in the house with just her mama and *libby* (yes, that is livie's new name according to lyla...). she wants to play, she wants to meet new people, she wants to say hi to the boy who's 1/2 a mile up the road that can't hear her. in short, lyla loves people, which is opening my eyes to how i have shut so many out in the excuse of being *shy*.

i am shy. don't get me wrong. i hate new situations where i'm the *new* girl...where i don't know anyone. where i have to take the first step in forming friendships. i have had 3 people in the last 4 years teach me about friendship - how to be a friend, how to reach out in the simplest of ways, how to hope for an amazing connection despite the chance of rejection...lyla is one of those people.

and so...i've been reaching out to those i've never met before and those who were dear to my heart before i left but lost touch with along the way.

one of those dear ones brought her little boy over today to meet lyla. since both are near or over 2, we thought it might be cute to see what would happen. there were great moments of lyla reaching out and inviting zachary to come play, but then both would dissolve to the use of the one word that is beloved by most 2 years olds; *mine*...and all joy and bliss would end for the next 15 minutes.

but we're learning...both of us. and while new friends will never replace old friends...the sad part of my heart is slowly becoming happy again.