the sleepy habits...

Monday, April 4, 2011

my eyes blink open, sleepy and full of adrenaline most mornings around 2 am.

always to the same sight.

a sleep-tousled little girl, breathing heavy and reaching for the covers to crawl underneath.

underneath to the warmth and safety and arms of her mama.

she will wrap herself up into the cocoon of me, drawing my arms snug around her tummy and sigh audibly as she is already half-way back to dreamland before i can ease my arm out from under her to bring the blankets up around both of our shoulders.

in the quiet of the dark and her soft snore and his warmth behind me, it takes me a few moments to fall back asleep.

and throughout today, as i cleaned bathrooms and ran the washing machine and chopped up the onions and carrots and celery for soup, i thought of the habit that these early morning wake up calls are becoming.

the habit of searching out safety,



and i thought of daniel and his seeking-God-out habit of praying three times a day...

of Jesus Himself, making a habit of stealing away to be alone with His Father...

of praying prayers for my son...for all my children, really, 10 times a day...

of each day, the habit of writing out my thanksgiving and watching Him transform my life, my home, my children as i strive to obey.

seeking Him out in the most simple and profound of ways.  and He opens His arms to me and draws me in close.

and in the chaos of a day, in the mundane of repetitive motions and answers and time-outs, i feel able to breathe...

because the air of thanksgiving that transforms even me, fills my lungs.

glimpses of *658-*713

*658 3 sets of little hands kept busy with play dough
*659 pre-school compromises

*660 wind
*661 warm air
*662 the way he climbs out of his high chair fearlessly
*663 their profiles
*664 skirt wearing
*665 sandaled feet
*666 little girl dresses
*672 lyla's smile
*673 getting elias dressed
*674 him discovering his belly button...again.
*675 singing scripture songs
*676 reading the perfect quote
*677 a sweet picture discovered

*678 strainer hats on little boys
*679 the way he flirts in his sweet, innocent 22 month old way
*680 that i fall for it and giggle like a school-girl
*684 breathtaking sunsets

*685 sick days
*686 thoughts that speak to my heart
*687 watching them share willingly
*688 quiet afternoons
*689 grilled cheese sandwiches
*690 glasses of milk
*691 sweet surprises brought home after a long day at work
*692 laughter in the dark
*693 a sister who prays
*694 a sleepy little boy who needs his mama to wake him up
*697 for these quiet moments at home
*698 for the strong bond we are building
*699 waiting,
*700 as i determine to trust
*701 simple beauty
*702 the way it speaks to my soul
*705 spilled popcorn
*706 empty wire baskets - full of possibility
*707 the blind beggar named bartimaeus
*710 chicken noodle soup simmering on the stove
*711 thin onion skins
* 712 holding him close, all sleepy-warm from his nap

*713 the counting down to christmas and birthdays ~ none of which are near