we had talked long,
that icy winter night, one year ago.
dinner was getting cold and so were my words.
he gently pulled the blanket up around my shoulders and whispered for me to rest.
quietly, he closed the door.
and i sat up.
reaching into the depths of my closet, i began removing items, searching for that which my heart finds priceless.
small and not much to look at, i clutched the worn, brown leather book to my chest and let the tears come.
i didn't open it at first, sometimes all one needs is to hold the very Word of God close and know that He is present.
i moved from my perch on that hope chest lovingly crafted by the hands of my grandfather...the one that he lost a finger in the making...to tony's side of the bed and laid down.
i gingerly opened the cover of my gramma's bible and was instantly enfolded in the scent of her perfume.
it had been 8 years since her eyes closed for the last time...8 years since she went home to Jesus and still, still the pages that bear the marks of tea, tears and years of use clung to the scent of the woman who had held it close.
underneath her distinct signature were the words,
the Will of God will never lead you
where the Grace of God cannot keep you
yes, gramma. the words you had placed so carefully underneath your name still ring with truth. a truth that i am learning to believe.
one year ago i had stood under a starry sky.
i stood with his mama and his brother who have experienced such horrific loss and under the expanse of black ink, i looked up to a moon that was being covered...hidden by the shadow of earth.
i stood with his mama and his brother who have experienced such horrific loss and under the expanse of black ink, i looked up to a moon that was being covered...hidden by the shadow of earth.
but not completely.
made to reflect the light of the sun, even at the point where the moon was covered fully, the reflection still shone brighter than the dark circle that had taken over.
pain, fear, uncertainty; while big and scary and at times overwhelming... they can't snuff out His light when we keep our faces turned to Him.
so i continue to look up. continue to keep my face raised to Him. continue to believe that He is bigger, He is brighter, He is present in every circumstance.
and that as i cling to Him, His fragrance will so encompass my life that it will permeate every chapter that i move through.
Emmanuel.
He will never lead us where His Grace cannot keep us.
and i'm learning there is no greater Truth...
and i'm learning there is no greater Truth...
praise You, Jesus...
an edited repost...
photo credit: jeremy and jo ferris
